Whoso pulleth out this sword…

The Sword in the Stone used to be one of my favourite Disney films when I was younger. Bringing us such classic quotes as ‘Impudent piece of crockery!’ and ‘Higitus, figitus, migitus, mum, prestidigitonium’, it never ceased to amaze, nor failed to make me laugh out loud. And so it is that this first experience of the Arthurian legend, has grown into something of a lifelong obsession with Arthur and everything surrounding him.

But, I think, one of the coolest things about the legends, has got to be the Sword in the Stone. I mean, if you can name another sword that had the power to decide who the king of all England would be, then speak now man! And this, in turn, has inspired me to write a blog post on the most legendary swords in fiction.

There are some pretty good ones too, but why not start with number 5? Counting down to the best, the brightest, the shiniest, the most legendary, we start at:

5. The Sword in the Stone from the Arthurian Legends (clearly)

So, some of you may be surprised to find this sword at the bottom, giving my glowing recommendation of it above – but I couldn’t spoil the surprise of number one now could I! And seeing as I’ve already given my argument for it, I think that’s enough said.

4. The Sword of Omens from Thundercats

The Sword of Omens is one of the most awesome swords I know, the only reason it’s down here at number four, is because it’s not in a book – well, it might be, somewhere, but in any case the place in which it most appeared, was/is on TV, and this therefore makes it less cool than the others on my list. This sword is here though, because it literally has it all: The blade can extend or retract, is near indestructible and is razor sharp. It can shoot blasts of energy with varying degrees of strength; it’s capable of stunning and electrocuting people/enemies/you if you’re not careful, and melting through solid objects. It can also generate force fields, create flame or ice, levitate and fly *takes a deep breath* on top of this, the Eye of Thundera, embedded in its hilt, gives all of the Thundercats their powers and has been known to have healing abilities, as well as being sentient, that’s right, this sword is alive. I could go on, but I won’t. The Sword of Omens, justified at our number 4.


3. The Vorpal Sword from Through the Looking Glass

Here is my reason for the Vorpal Sword coming third:

 

Beware the Jabberwock, my son!
  

The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!


Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun
  

The frumious Bandersnatch!

 

He took his vorpal sword in hand:
  

Long time the manxome foe he sought 

So rested he by the Tumtum tree,
  

And stood awhile in thought.

 

And, as in uffish thought he stood,
  

The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,


Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
  

And burbled as it came!

 

One, two! One, two! And through and through
  

The vorpal blade went snicker-snack!


He left it dead, and with its head
  

He went galumphing back.

 

“And, has thou slain the Jabberwock?
  

Come to my arms, my beamish boy!


O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!” 

He chortled in his joy.

 

2. Narsil/Andúril from The Lord of the Rings

OK, the power to decide who will be the next king of England is pretty cool, but Narsil has the power to vanquish GIGANTIC FLAMING EYES. Maybe that’s a bit of an exaggeration, but it was the sword that cut the One Ring from Sauron’s hand in the Lord of the Rings, and therefore, by extension, destroyed the Eye of Sauron. So in effect, I’m right. That is, if the eye of Sauron existed during the War of the Last Alliance. Yeah, I’m going to stop talking now. Aragorn is awesome, his sword is therefore awesome, end of.

 

1. And our number one . . . Inigo Montoya’s sword from The Princess Bride

I’m not entirely sure why this is my number one, but it’s here because The Princess Bride is just so cool, a blend of fantasy and humour that blows my mind every time. This is a sword that sparked a lifetime’s worth of revenge seeking and comes the immortal words ‘Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die’, and you can’t say much better than that.

 

Do you have another sword that you reckon should be on here? Leave a comment below and let me know what I’ve missed!

 

 

2 Comments:

  1. Conan’s Atlantean sword always resonated with me. It was cool and let’s be honest, Conan knew what was best in life.
    Snake Eye’s from GI Joe introduced many of us to the katana and it was the coolest thing we’d ever seen.
    Not a sword in the traditional sense, but I don’t think any of us will forget the first time we heard the snap-hiss of the lightsaber.
    And finally, a recent entry, Ice of GRRM’s A Song of Ice and Fire. Cool name, cool details (the rippling steel) and it’s a magic sword.

  2. Thundercats! HO! Classic telly.
    Sorry. I just regressed to a ten year old.

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